Snobby Bobby - My shocking Bumble conversation

This is a REAL conversation that I had with a guy on Bumble that I matched with. Right before the conversation in the photo started, He had just asked me out on a date and I had given him my Facebook, Instagram, and Twitter info because he had asked for it. Which is normal and fine. You like to make sure the person you're going out with isn't going to murder you, or isn't a catfish. The top message is the first thing he wrote after I sent him my Instagram. It still blows my mind that this conversation ever happened. I'm just still confused about how in the world he thought writing a question like that to a girl was ok. Also all he would have had to do after the first message was apologize and it would have been fine. But he just kept digging himself into a deeper and deeper hole. Also, I would just like to say that I think all my Instagram and Facebook photos are super cute.

The thing that I find the funniest about this whole thing is that he was acting like I was trying to be deceitful about my appearance. Hahaha. It was just so bizarre because I had at least 3 full body shots in my bumble profile. I'm obviously not trying to hide anything. Honestly I feel like the photos in my bumble profile are a good representation of what I look like in real life and I have no idea what he would have seen on my Instagram/Facebook that would have given the impression that I was "bigger" than I appeared on my bumble profile. And if he wasn't attracted to me in those, then all he had to do was not swipe right, not respond to my messages, and not ask me out on a date.

The most offensive thing about this whole conversation is that he assumes that if you're a bigger girl, health and fitness aren't important to you and that you don't respect or take care of yourself. WHAT THE HECK! That's so offensive on so many levels. Now I'm just going to go out on a limb here and say that health and fitness aren't actually important to him... size is important to him. And if that's the case, just be kind and go on your way. If you don't want to date "bigger girls" than just don't ask them out. There is no reason to be rude. If you don't find me attractive, just don't ask me out. I won't care. There are a million other guys out there that think I'm gorgeous and do want to date me. I'll just date one of them. It's fine. What isn't fine, is body shaming and cyber bullying.

It's not that I don't understand at all where he's coming from. I too have been a little surprised about a person's appearance when meeting someone from an online dating site. and I have been on a LOT of dates with guys I'm not super attracted to. But I have never left the date feeling upset about it or seen them as less-than. I've never felt it a burden or angering to sit and have a conversation with someone that I'm not necessarily attracted to. It's a human being, and a person's appearance shouldn't determine your kindness or respect. And like one date with someone you're not interested in is going to kill you. Unless they're a murderer. But that's not funny.

Now, I admit, I could have just not responded to him (or been a little less snarky). That would have been the easier thing to do. But I also think it is important to stand up to bullies. If everyone just ignores them and doesn't stand up to them, they are going to continue to treat people like that and think it's ok. And I'm sure I didn't stop this guy from doing the same thing again, but at least he's been told that saying things like that aren't ok. To women or men. This just really affected me because I have a lot of friends who have been victim to body shaming and emotional abuse. And they have always been women who took care of themselves. I know a lot of women who have struggled with disordered eating and emotional issues as a direct result of bullying and body shaming. You never know how your words might effect someone so we all need to be careful about what we say and how we treat others. I'm obviously am not perfect at this, but I try to see things from other's perspective and make things right if I do hurt someone.

The purpose of this post isn't to say "poor me" or to point a finger at this guy and say he's a terrible person. Although, I definitely don't think he's a nice person. But it's more to raise awareness. Things like this do happen online and it's not ok. If it can happen to someone like me who is confident, fit, and tries pretty dang hard to look good. (Yes, I know I make it look effortless, but it does take work) than it is happening to a lot of other people out there.

I should have known he was going to act like this when had like 5 posts about how much he admires and supports Donald Trump. haha. 

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Oh, the things you find on Craigslist

So after watching a funny little segment of the Ellen show called "Bestest of Craigslist" I decided to go on the Salt Lake Craigslist sight and see what kind of things I would find. Here are some of my favorite finds with my personal commentary. haha.

1.

But seriously, who goes to all the trouble to post an ad on craigslist for one piece of fruit, well, 1 3/4 pieces of fruit. They even added 2 photos. They really couldn't find someone more convenient to give the pomegranate to, like maybe someone at the lunch table, or a roommate, or a homeless person? haha
Go here if you want to see the original post.

2.

Ok, this is really sad that her apartment burnt down, but why would you mention the R-rated pictures that are on the camera!!? Now you're never going to get it back and you'll probably be blackmailed.
Go here to see original post.

3.

Hahaha. The pictures on this one made me laugh. These are some great beauty shots and I really hope they are originals from the person who posted the add. 

Go here to see original post. 

4.

I feel like you'd have to be pretty desperate to put up an ad that says literally anything, and I really don't think this guy knows what he's getting himself into here. He's probably thinking along the lines of home repair jobs, like handy man type stuff. But let me tell you, there are weird people here in Salt Lake and that's just asking for strange people to contact you. He's going to end up being asked to burry a dead body or something. I don't know, but I am worried for him. 

Go here to see original post.  

5. 

After reading the description, I'm still not exactly sure what she is selling or what a "At One With Natural Events" entails. But I highly encourage you to visit her website and try and figure it out for yourself. It plays very soothing music when you open the site and has many more delightful photos like the one posted above. :)

Go here to see original post. 

6. 

Ok, I'm not sure if the person who wrote this ad is all the way there, or maybe just doesn't speak/write english very well. Either way, this is a really weird ad and I am really confussed. I really hope this person's neighbor didn't loose their deaf child, and if they did, I hope they have better help out there than this. 

Go here to see original post. 

7. 

There were a couple more like this too. Shame on you for offering to do people's homework! I am not going to encourage this behavior by posting the link. 

8. 

The last one is for Exotic House Cleaning. I'm not exactly sure what that entails, but it sounds weird and kind of creepy. You can search for the post if you want to, but I'm not posting the picture of a girl wearing a short maid costume holding a vacuum. She doesn't say anything inappropriate, besides her bra size...weird. It's just not attractive and I'm not going to submit anyone to that photo. And the fact that she describes her personal appearance more than her cleaning skills tells me she might have better luck posting it in the personals section. haha. I'm not posting the link for this one either because it's mostly disturbing. 

Rules of the Hot Tub

So, I was prepared for just another normal night at the gym, but little did I know, this was going to be anything but ordinary. First I get there and the place is packed, probably because it's January 2 and everyone has set New Years resolutions to work out... ugh. I mean, good for you for deciding to go to the gym, but don't be stealing all the towels and lockers from those of us that are loyal gym-goers. So, within the first minute I'm already annoyed because all the towels are gone which means I now have to drip dry. Then I get to the pool and of course all the lanes are taken which means I have to wait, so I decide to wait in the hot tub. And this is when things start to get interesting.

So, you'd think that most people (those free from mental illness) would have a pretty good understanding of what is socially acceptable and unacceptable, but let me tell you, they don't. And usually if I encounter a person that is acting socially unacceptable I either do 1 of 2 things: 1. if it's entertaining, I observe from a safe distance, and 2. if I feel it's going to have a negative effect on my metal or physical well being, I avoid the situation and keep my distance. But I discovered today that once you're in a hot tub, that's a little harder to do.  And that's when I decided that public hot tubs should have social rules that people must agree to follow before they can enter.

So I'm sitting in the corner of the hot tub, minding my own business, just trying to be the best I can be, when Elmo boy walks in. (for those of you unfamiliar with the story, Elmo boy is a guy I met in the hot tub a couple months ago who tried to impress me by speaking in the voice of Elmo for an entire conversation... not as effective as you might think, for those of you who have considered using this approach.) And of course, Elmo boy sits by me. Right after that, a super in love/lust couple get into the hot tub and sit on the other side of me. Then, just when I think things can't get any more awkward, they do. The couple started off sitting side by side, whispering sweet nothings into each others ears, but it didn't take them long before he was on top of her. Now they're face to face, heads barely above water. Pinned in the corner and nowhere to go, I started to panic and the first thing that came to my mind was "pretend you're asleep." So I did exactly that. I leaned my head back and closed my eyes. But that didn't help for long because the audio was just as bad as the visual (if you get what I mean).  That was it! I couldn't take it anymore. I didn't care if I had to stand by the pool dripping wet without a towel, freezing to death, I couldn't spend another second in that hot tub. So I decided to make my escape. But as I stood up and tried to make it out of the hot tub, I tripped over the couples legs, tumbling into despair and humiliation. I don't know if I have ever been so mentally and emotionally disturbed in my life! But don't worry, it doesn't end there.

After finally escaping the hot tub, wet and cold, I patiently waited for a lane in the pool as another couple got out and dried off, each wrapping 3 warm dry towels around them (now I know where all the towels went). No, I'm not bitter at all by this point. 

Eventually, I finally made it into the pool. Since there were more people waiting for lanes, I swam a quick 20 laps and seeing the creepy couple and Elmo boy had left,  I decided to get back into the hot tub to warm up, again sitting down in a corner..... not a good idea. Soon after I sat down, a very tall older gentleman started doing stretches in the middle of the hot tub. At first I found it entertaining and humorous because he looked ridiculous, but then things started to get bothersome when he started doing more intense movement oriented exercises. It wouldn't have been so bad if he were a little smaller, but his body mass started creating quite the waves. Plus add to the fact that i'm super petite so my head is closer to the water and i'm in a corner which makes the waves hit me harder. Eventually, it gets to the point where every few seconds I am getting slapped in the face by a pool of hot water; which then makes me start to get especially hot. So I am sitting in the corner burning up, with waves of fury hitting my face. Fed up, I decide I have had enough and i'm getting out. Right at this point the man starts doing exercises where he's swinging his arms back and forth and since he's so tall, they are spanning the length of the hot tub with a serious force. Well, now there is no way that if I tried walking past him that I would make it out alive. I was just going to have to wait it out. And that I did. 

But don't worry, this story ends happily because I eventually made it out of the hot tub and when I got to the locker room I was able to find a small hand towel to sort of help dry me off. Needless to say, tomorrow I will be bringing my own towel and sitting as close to the stairs as humanly possible when in the hot tub. 

The construction worker and the man in a wheelchair

I was waiting for the trax today when the crowd was informed there was a gas leak so the train wasn't coming and we would have to wait for a bus to take us north.  While standing there waiting, a construction worker standing near started talking to me about the situation.  Then, to be punny (pun + funny) he asked me "how's the weather down there?"  (typical short joke) so i told him I had heard that one a million times and he was going to have to come up with something better than that. So he asked me if i had to use a ladder to reach my mailbox. (i've never heard that one before, so i will give him props for that.)  Then he started asking more personal questions like how long i have lived here and what i did for a living, etc. 

The bus eventually came and when i got on, he came and sat next me and told me that even though i was short i was also really cute. Awwwww.

In the meantime a very cheerful older man in a wheelchair with a long beard started talking to me.  He had a cast on his leg so i asked him what happened.  The second I asked, he proceeded to reach into the neck of his sweatshirt, (note that this sweatshirt did not have a pocket, he just kept it in between his clothing) and pulled out a hand-full of x-rays and medical papers showing me the pictures from his surgery and the bolts they had put in his foot.  (Wow, i was not expecting to see that)

After the guy in the wheelchair finished his story, the construction worker started talking to me again, asking more personal questions like how old I was and if i had a boyfriend.  So i told him i was 25 and he said he was 35 and i said, "yea, that's old." haha.  Then he asked me if I was was ever free, for a date, like on the weekends, and I told him not for another month. (which is actually true, so i wasn't lying) Then he asked if he could give me his number and I could call him if I ever wanted to go on a date and I said sure.  So he gave me his number, and then got off the bus and said it was nice to meet you as he walked away.  

So, in conclusion, I still got it.  And I wasn't even trying.  haha.  and I probably am not going to call him.  But props for trying. What a great courageous soul. 

He REALLY liked my hat

I had been on the trax for about three minute when the guy sitting diagonally to me stood up, put his hands in the air and yelled "HELLO!!" After a few seconds passed and no one looked up, he did it again..."HELLO!!" Then he sat down, looked in my direction and said, "Nobody ever responds."  Me, trying really hard not to bust out into laughter couldn't help but let a small grin appear on my face. Well that turned out to be a big mistake because he then decided that we were friends.  And that's when the following conversation started........

Man:  "Ma'am, ma'am, excuse me ma'am."

Me: (while taking my headphones off)  "yea?"

Man:  "I really like your hat."

Me:  "Thank you"

Man:  "No, I don't think you understand, I REALLY like your hat."

Me:  "Thanks." (while putting my headphones back in)

about a minute later.....

Man:  "Ma'am, ma'am, excuse me ma'am."

Me: (while taking my headphones off)  "yea?"

Man:  "Can I see that?"

Me: (confused look on my face)

Man:  "Don't worry, I won't bite."

Me: "I don't know what you're talking about."

Man:  "Your ring, It's really cool."

Me:  "Thanks"

Man:  "It looks like something Aztec."

Me:  "It's a flower." (while putting my headphones back in)

a couple minutes later.....

Man: "Ma'am, ma'am, excuse me ma'am."

Me: (while taking my headphones off)  "yea?"

Man: "Can I ask you a question?"

Me: "What?"

Man:  "When were you born?"

Me: "I'm not answering that."

Man:  "I just want to know the month."

Me:  "August"

Man:  "Oh, you're a libra, that's what I thought."

and that's when i got off the train.

And my birthday isn't actually in August.  But really, if you're going to go to all that work just to know my zodiac sign, at least know the zodiac signs enough to know when they are.  August is not libra.  Duh.

And here he is.

She Will Never Be Lonely Again

It was early morning as I boarded the trax with my fellow passengers and sat down at the nearest seat I could find.  To my pleasant surprise I had sat down right across from a very lovely unique older lady.  I didn't think much of her talking as i took my seat, assuming she was on the phone. But after noticing her strange mumbling and quick change of topics, I looked over with sheer delight to see that she was not talking on the phone at all.  She was talking to her own reflection in the window.  

The following is what I picked up from her conversations with three different "friends" on my 10 minute train ride to work:

"Friend" #1:  Christy

This conversation consisted of how the government was trying to steal her identity and how they had some sort of tracking system on her in case she ever tries to leave the country.  Then she started spouting out a bunch of really long numbers which turned into a mumble.  Then she was saying how she is now using her maiden name to try and trick the government so they won't know who she is. (smart tactic)  

"Friend" #2:  Greg

This conversation started off talking about something that happened in September of 1947.  Something to do with an airport in Spain, and the government.  Then she was talking about how someone got kidnapped and hypnotized and then disappeared.  

"Friend" #3:  Bonnie

This conversation was about how someone was pushed in front of a bus.  "that wasn't an accident, she was pushed in front of that bus."  then how the same lady that did that had come after her too.  but don't worry, she's not scared of her anymore.  

So in conclusion, who needs real friends when you can make up your own? You'll never be lonely again. 

Chapstick

So there was this guy on the train that kept starring at me.  And it's not the "I'm flattered" type of guy, it's the "I'm creeped out"  type of guy. 

Then I accidently looked up and made eye contact. (bad move) So he creepily smiled at me then started putting chapstick on in a slow creepy manner.

I think he was trying to be seductive but I'm not sure, because I was scared and looked away too quickly.

And I never looked back.  The End.